The Restory Retreat Centre

Photograph by Matilda Angus “We live our lives, for ever taking leave.”                                                               Rainer Maria Rilke My father lived his life using his mind. He did not have to look up mathematical formulas. He carried it conveniently along in his head. Life was a trigonometrical problem for which tan and cosine applied. He could basically fix anything mechanical. He has Alzheimer’s. In the past few months there has been a rapid deterioration. I stand in his room in the retirement home, look at his mind through what I see. There are shoes next to his CD player, a light bulb in his socks drawer, his TV re...

Photograph by Frans Marais In about two weeks time we are having a high school reunion. I’ve been told that  even class mates  now living  and working in the USA have indicated that they are coming. I, on this side of the Atlantic, am standing on a Sunday afternoon in the door of the bathroom. I’m about to take my dad back to the retirement village after a visit over the weekend here on Barrowfield. There is tension between us. He blames me for the farm in Gauteng being sold and him being in the retirement village. We just cannot agree on his frailty and the adjustments we have to make when we get older. As if totally oblivious to our struggles with Oupa Frans and the sleepless night we had while he visited, he is upset because we did not spend any time in the workshop. I’m tired of trying to explain and having the same conversations over and over. I am not proud of the manner  in which I often cope with his fears. I am constantly confronted with my own...

Christ is the bread, awaiting hunger. St. Augustine Matilda took her father through to the retirement village in Wakkerstroom today. Within a few weeks we’ll be moving as well, so we’ll be close by, living on the farm a little out of town. We know that the retirement facilities and care are very good, but on a personal level we really want him to be happy there. This past weekend we moved his furniture into his new room and furnished it with his favourite chairs, new curtains and linen and put up the family photos he loves. With us doing that, Matilda’s sister Marinetha looked after him and my father here on the farm at Rietfontein. A real logistical exercise to have our hands free and them taken care of. Earlier this afternoon Matilda sent me a picture of him lying on his bed in the sun in his new room, listening to his favourite music and singing along. It is still early days, but he seems to like his new surroundings. To us it is such a relief. This was the fir...