The Restory Retreat Centre

  Quiet In The Turmoil The Conversation Elements From The Conversation Music In opera you often get silences intertwined with a more tumultuous background. Song To The Moon  by by Antonin Dvorak is  a beautiful example.  With love. And the longing that our love will reflect something of God's expansive love.  George & Matilda

  Meditation In Practice This week's post is very lean and stripped. The focus is on the meditation practice.   The Conversation Love. George & Matilda

  The Importance Of The Quiet Practice The Conversation Elements From The Conversation  The eye is the lamp of the body.  If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eyes are unhealthy,  your whole body will be full of darkness.  If then the light within you is darkness,  how great is that darkness!                                                                                      ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭6:22-23‬ ‭NIV‬‬ ‭‭                                                                           ...

At the beginning of August this year, Matilda and I attended the last of our Living School Symposiums in Albuquerque, New Mexico. With that the formal part of our two year program, run by the Center for Action and Contemplation, officially came to an end. The readings of the Christian mystics old and new, the introduction to bright minds, high thought, humble lives, honest searching, different ways of knowing, an unfathomable great and delicately small God, us as wondrous and limited, the discussions and the work on our “integration project” became such a big part of our lives that it is very difficult to imagine a time without it. But the Living School was never intended to be a purpose or goal in itself. It is a doorway into a new way of looking and living and for that reason we enter this new phase of our lives with excitement and anticipation. Looking back and taking stock of the past two years, what were some of the discoveries we’ve made? We have discovered –...

Photograph by George Angus For a while now I’ve been walking around with a printout of a poem by Wendell Berry in my journal. I had it in a file on my computer, totally forgot about it and while I was searching for something else I discovered it again. On face value it is a beautiful poem, but it was as if it somehow struck an even deeper chord in me. I found it difficult to describe why exactly that was the case. So I made the printout and read it every now and again, meditated on it and wrote in its margins. I wanted to get out of the way so that it could work its magic on me in every way it pleased. Words 1.    What is one to make of a life given    to putting things into words,    saying them, writing them down?    Is there a world beyond words?    There is. But don't start, don't    go on about the tree unqualified,    standing in light that shines    to time's end beyond its summon...

Matilda and I discovered contemplative spirituality, as an element of the age-old Christian mystical tradition, in our middle ages. “Discover” is probably not the right word. We grew into it, it grew on and in us, through our reading we were gently and graciously guided and called into it, our religious disillusionments and disappointments and the longing for the more led us to it, very difficult periods in our lives and emotional crisis prepared us for it and almost made it inevitable. As is the case with so much in this type of spirituality it is shrouded in mystery and paradox. To such an extent that you find that the phrase No one catches the wild ass by running,  and yet only those who run ever catch the wild ass. exactly expresses what has happened, without clarifying it at all. I probably use the word “discover” to describe the process, because it says something of the fact that this was not a tradition we were familiar with or were exposed to in our...

Photograph by Elliott Erwitt, New York City 1953 We cannot attain the presence of God because we're already totally in the presence of God. What's absent is awareness.                                                                                          David G. Benner In a previous post ( Klein Kaper ) Matilda wrote about the new arrival in the household, the kitten named Patat (Patat being Afrikaans for sweet potato and commonly used as a term of endearment especially where children are concerned). Lately he is often called Tappet as well (Tappet is an English word used in Afrikaans to describe a person somewhat rough around the edges. For some reason “tappet” just does not have a similar meaning in English). Since Matilda introduced him he has g...

Photograph by Hanna Jacobs In our consumer society it might be a challenge writing an ad for contemplation*. I imagine it going something like this: Do not go the contemplative route if you want absolute control over your life and do not like surprises. We are not in a position to answer questions like “What is this going to ask from me?”; “Where will I eventually end up by practicing this?” This is definitely not for you if you are looking for a tame, predictable God and you do not like your boat to be rocked. Maybe you are a person loving life’s comforts in general and comfort zones in particular. In that regard you find a religion where your basic cultural values, ideals and yard sticks are maintained with a gospel layer laid on top of it ideal. If that is the case, steer clear from this. It is also not for you if you want to continue with business as usual. The contemplative life will change you. You are going to become you. Maybe that is exactly the one thing that yo...

So much to do, so little time.  To live the contemplative life amidst all the pressure and challenges of daily living is no mean feat. From experience I know that paradoxically, the busier my life becomes, the quieter I need to be. The moment the pace picks up is exactly the time to listen to the still, small voice. It is not so much frantic activity that provides the solution as entering into the silence. Then it is very important not to neglect my meditation practice. The latter helps especially in discerning what is important and how to go about in planning my day. It centres me and guides me in finding my place once again within the wider order of things. I constantly forget that. I become anxious and frantic and tend to follow another rule: When in darkness or in doubt Run in circles, scream and shout It does not help. It drains me and leaves me empty. Ever so gently I am returning to my breathing and the quiet and the listening. In the process I find couns...

Photograph by George Angus Matilda’s nephew Liam has a friend Stephan. Although being only 9 now, the 2 of them has been a fountain of wisdom over the years. A few years ago, on starting playing rugby for the first time, Stephan became very frustrated. As soon as he got the ball, he was tackled. Quite upset he told Matilda’s brother in law: “Oom William, I just can’t get my speed!” I can relate with Stephan’s frustration. Ever since we came to Barrowfield there have been so many practicalities that needed attention that it has been difficult to get my speed writing and meditating. My mind is filled with pipe diameters, the solenoid on tractor starters, pressure pumps, skylights, ropes and rigging, tending to our fathers’ health and adjustment in the retirement village, setting up internet modems, bookshelves and all the rest. In the spare moments that I get to sit at the computer, I am so tired that it is difficult to keep my eyes focused and open. I have to be honest ...

Photo by C. du Preez "The artist is no more and no less than a contemplative who has learned to express himself,  and who tells his love in color, speech or sound:  The mystic, upon one side of his nature, is an artist of a special and exalted kind." - Evelyn Underhill

Dag Hammarskjöld, Secretary-General of the United Nations from 1953 to 1961, died in a plane crash while still in office. Widely praised and respected for the work he had done, h e is the only person to have been awarded a posthumous Nobel Peace Prize. After his death, a journal that he kept was found in his house. He referred to these entries “as a sort of a white book concerning my negotiations with myself – and with God.” The journal was published under the title Markings and in the years that followed became a spiritual classic. A remark by W.H. Auden in his foreword to Markings, haunts me lately. He said that Hammarskjöld’s journal is an account “of the attempt by a professional man of action to unite in one life the via activa and the via contemplativa .” For me, this phrase captures one of the central issues of the spiritual life. The attempt to unite in one life the way of action and the way of contemplation. Experience shows that we often tend to overemphasize one of ...